Monday, February 21, 2011

Well There You Go

Well can I just say WHAT A WEEK!
Glad last week is over and if I can just get this stupid paper written all will be well with the world.

Guess what the stupid enter button on this keyboard isn't working very well.

This will be awesome.  My whole paper will be one long paragraph.  I'm pretty sure the GSA would except it that way... No they wouldn't because they're incredibly picky.  But guess what I'm not sending them my paper that would be stupid.  My paper is just everyone else's research.  Can I say I just don't understand the point of a research paper that you don't do the actual research for?  I mean I feel stupid writing it because I pretty much have to site everything I say in the paper.  Oh well

 I'm completely confused about everything at the moment.  Frustrated and starting to wish I took this semester off to go live in a big city for awhile.  Dye my hair and change my name so no one could find me, but me.
Oh dear, maybe I've been listening to too much folk music, I'm becoming a bit you know, crazy.  I guess that's what Mumford & Sons will do to you.  Well I can't entirely blame them.

So one thing maybe you don't know about me: when things happen and I should react right away or have questions or have answers, I don't.  My mind goes completely blank.  All I can think about is what just happened.  It's weird and I don't really know how to process things.  Of course this is not always the case.  Sometimes it's just hours later. Haha.  So now I have all these questions and I'm trying to find answers and it's so tiring and distracting.


Renny said...

Cha it is. My advice is that now that you have your questions don't wait to get your answers, because eventually it will be almost two years later and you'll be in law school and you'll have pretty much moved on with your life but there will be things that STILL nag you that you never got answers to and you can't ask the questions now because it'll just be beating a dead horse and people will just wonder why you can't just move on, and really that wouldn't be fair because you HAVE moved on. You moved across the whole country to move on for crying out loud! And your life is really in a much better place, but it still bothers you because you should have been appalled and asked the question right then in the situation, but you were too busy reeling from the shock of what you just heard, and you had gotten absolutely no sleep the night before, so you couldn't think straight, but now it's too late and there is some guy out there who will never fully understand that he totally screwed up everything you ever believed about yourself and you still doubt if you'll ever be able to trust anything anyone tells you ever again because you THOUGHT some people liked you but it turned out no, you weren't good enough for them, they just like to play mind games with you, and who the crap are they to judge you anyway? And then you will spiral down into an angry pit and wish you had just asked your questions when you had the chance.

So. That is my advice. As your older sister. Who has been there. And doesn't want you to turn into me. Because you still have a chance to be normal.

alirara said...

Um yeah... you're so weird. :) I love you anyways.